Today I had my last "baby appointment", ever. And, I do mean ever. Justin and I do not plan on having any more children. If I got pregnant again, there would be some serious issues in this house! Mainly because you would have to lock me up! I am very ready for this kiddo to come. While I do try to savor the kicks and rolls inside of me, I am very uncomfortable and emotional. I had a total breakdown this morning after waking up at 3:30am and not being able to go back to sleep. I am feeling overwhelmed at the thought of having three kids to take care of but I'm also feeling guilty that I can't "do things" with the kids now. I think Justin was actually encouraged by my little breakdown this morning (I cried for the length of my shower mainly because I was just so tired but also because I can't make Kyle come). He told me he thought I had been doing so well and that maybe I would just be pregnant forever. Not so much.
My C-section is scheduled for August 1st at 10am and I do hope to have a baby by 10:30am on that day. I have been asked if I would just want to wait it out and see if he comes on his own but I would like to be home and recovered some by the time Brice goes back to school on the 8th. Selfish??, Perhaps. But, as I told the doctor last week, I am looking forward to maybe having the controlled situation of a planned C-section. I will have child care. I will have pain medication. No, I am not looking forward to having major surgery and may need to be knocked out on Sunday night in order to get any sleep but what I went through with Anna was very scary for me and Justin and I do not wish to repeat that situation. Now, having said all of that, God will put me through what He knows I can handle and if he has planned for me to go into labor on my own, then so be it. Today, Kyle was measuring 7 lbs. 6 oz (give or take, they can be off up to a pound either way) so I am willing to try and deliver naturally if he is ready between now and Monday. And, when I say naturally, I mean Mother Nature's natural route but with some pain medication!
I feel as though I have kept everyone on pins and needles long enough and we are all just looking forward to meeting our newest addition. Everything around here is as ready as it's going to be. We have diapers, wipes, bottles, blankets, burp cloths, clothes, the car seat and one ready momma. All in all, I would say, It's Baby Time. I thought I would feel a little sad by today's appointment, but I honestly didn't. Maybe, I was just too tired to even feel emotions about it. I am sincerely looking forward to having this baby and raising my family, as well as having my body back! As of right now, I can't breathe, I pee every hour if not more than that, and a flight of stairs leaves me out of breath. I am hoping the next time I post, it will be of pictures of our new little man! My first-born is now calling for me to rub his legs, growing pains.